do u still remember? (ARHJ Part 61)

do u still remember the time when u were so excited to tell me this novel's ending?
ok memang agak pelik lelaki baca novel. tapi bila tengok adik lelaki aku pun baca novel dah hilang dah rasa pelik. ehe~

do you still remember the time when u always ask me about medicine?
truthfully sometimes i had to Google it cuz i never heard of that medicine! (kantoi)

 do you still remember the time when all of ur questions were answered with one short sentence.
example:-
Q: dah makan? 
A: dah
Q: pakai baju ape pergi kerja hari ni? 
A: baju
Q: makan ape tadi? 
A: nasi
Q: best tak benda tu? 
A: entah
Q: dah solat dah?
A: dah
now i get so excited that one short question was answered with long elaborated answer
Q: sedap x?
A: x sedapla. tomyam ikan yg mama kita masak lagi sedap! 

do u still remember our fights?
we cry, we fight, we quarrel. but in the end, we vowed not to leave each other.
him: awak nak tinggalkan kita ke?
me: tak nak
him: kite pun xnak awak pergi mana2, ok?


do u still remember when u promise to write something for ARHJ?
berbulan tunggu, sampai dah give up nak berharap.
lepas tu tiba2 ada entry yg awak tulis!
terkejut gila masa tu...
suke sangat!!!

do u still remember when i use to sing Barney's song "I love u?" 
tot i sounds cute enough but awak lg cute mase awak nyanyi lagu banana potatoooooo.
serius!


those small details in our life maybe insignificant to others.
but i refuse to let it pass by unnoticed.
truthfully, dat is why ARHJ exist in the 1st place.
so that one day, we can sit down and read it from skin to skin and walk down the memory lane.

*perbualan sengal hari ini*
HJ: awak! jentik sampai bibir awak berdarah2 karang.
AR: xpe. kita da beli aloe lip care kat bodyshop. gerenti x berdarah.
HJ: are u sure?
huhu~

awak. 
happy 10 months annivesary!
i love u infinity and beyond!!! (sambil angkat tangan macam Buzz Lightyear) Y^.^

in years come, we'll reminiscence on how u were made to complete my duet.

Age hasn’t spoiled you (ARHJ part 60)

+ For your birthday, I just want to say I hope you can see

 how special you are to me..

+ I hope that today is the beginning of a great year for you..

+ Age is a number, but life is your calculator..

+ Let this day be full of all the colors of the rainbow..

happy birthday dr AR...

  

p/s i : hope you love it..(sorwy sebab simple sgt..) 
p/s ii : ikhlas dari HEARTY ke HEARTY 
p/s iii :  :') 

writen by : dr j...^-^

despicable ME (ARHJ part 59)

hai...tak tau nak start dari mana..tapi sebab kene jugak wat entry nie so aku pown tulis jer ape yang ada kat kepala nie..

first of all..assalamualaikum and greetings to all...alhamdulillah sekarang nie kita dah nak masuk 10 ramadhan..rasa cepat jer kan..ok..straight to the titik :
i.thank.you.for.everything..
kalau nak ikutkan bila looking back..memang macam funny la kot..
so much dah jadi..moulding me yet again into another somebody
yg belajar dan membesar dgn mengenali seseorang yang aku belum pernah jumpa tapi hidup...ye..hidup dalam hati aku..aku akan terus dan terus hidup kan rasa tu..dan..aku berdoa supaya si dia akan kuat n kuat n kuat n kuat..amin ya rabb..

+dear...sikit jer lagiii....sabar ye... :')
+thankz sebab kenal kan aku dgn cerita despicable me..(hahaha dulu tak pandai sebut...tapi sekarang laju jer tau nak sebut despicable tu..hahaha)

perangai kite mmg giler2...bile call jer..gelak macam tgk running man...seyes....aku suka...hehe tapi sometimes...kalau kite gaduh...mesti kamu menangis macam tgk cite hindustan...(walau tgk dah bnyk kali)
tak sanggup nyer dgr kamu nanges...huuu...

last but not  least "kot"
i love you baby..hehehe tak pe ke ckp dekat public mcm nie?? hahahaha sorwy bby...

writen by : dr j... ^-^

p/s i : aku means HJ ke???
p/s ii : awak means AR ke??
p/s iii : kamu+aku = ARHJ 

i'll kill him! (ARHJ Part 58)

"dah jumpe ke belum?" soal teman baikku saat aku bercerita mengenai HLovate yang merupakan penulis favorite HJ.

"belum" jawabku perlahan. sedih mengenangkan sudah 8 bulan bercinta tapi masih belum bertentang mata. sampai ramai menganggap aku berstatus 'single'.

"argghhh i'll kill him!!!" kata temanku.

tiba- tiba telefonku menyanyikan lagu "mirrors". eh, panjang umur si HJ ni. baru je sebut pasal dia.

"Hye awak! iza baru cakap nak kill u" bicaraku.

"errrr.. kenapa?" soal HJ

"sebab x dtg jumpe kite" jawabku ringkas.

"nanti bila kita xde siapa nak dengar awak mengomel pasal kerja? siapa nak dengar awak menangis? siapa nak teman awak bila awak sedih?" panjang lebar dia bertanya.

ok. he got a point. tapi dengan selamba aku menjawab "xpe. i'll go back to my blog."

"xnak kawan awak!" jawab HJ.

"ok. babai awak *giggling silently*"

ok. diam dalam blog tak bermakna kami dah berpisah. atau tiada cerita menarik. atau cinta kami sudah kurang gula. tolong jangan salah faham ye.

tapi nampaknya tahun ini saya masih terpaksa menghadapi sekali lagi hari raya dengan soalan berikut:-
bila nak kahwin? 
dah ada calon ke belum? kalau xde calon meh nak kenalkan..

atau yang sewaktu dengannya. 
haishs *mengeluh panjang*

"awak, kita nak nangis bila orang tanya soalan macam tu. orang lain dah beranak pinak. hiks" ujarku kepada HJ.
"sabarlah" jaawabnya ringkas.

arghhhh..... kadang2 rasa macam nak geget HJ kuat2. orang tengah perli awak lah! 

ok. cool down. take a deep breath. cool down...
fuhhh *inhale and exhale deeply*

Ya ALLAH. aku redha dengan apa jua ketentuanMu. Mudah- mudahan semua ini berakhir dengan bahagia.AMIN.

bubly bablings

being a medical officer is not easy.
as a houseman you can always 'hide' behind your MOs.
anything you are not sure you can just inform MO and write "Dr. X noted" just to save your ass in case something bad happens.
but now, being the one who receive the call and the one who had to decide, my life is not getting easier at all!

my boss said to me "Ainul, it's not about seniority. never mind whether you have been MO for a year, or 5 years or more. it is all about competency."
but actually, i still think that experience still plays important part in medical field. 
my seniors helps a lot, even senior nurses plays important role.
because when i graduate, doesn't mean that i know everything that it takes to be a doctor.
in fact, sometimes i feel so stupid.
even as a medical officer i am still learning.

sometimes, i was scolded when i refer case to my colleagues. there was even a time when i refuse to refer because i am so afraid of being scolded. but one specialist said to me "just refer even if they scold you. at least you have done your job." so if they become mad at me and refuse to come and see patient, what the heck. i can fire back by saying "oh, ok. then i'll just write in the case sheet that you cannot see this patient, ok?" (don't worry, they will nag and scream but they still had to see the patient and that is the most important part. ehe~)

dealing with colleagues may be hard but dealing with patient can also drain my energy.
"how come i got cancer? i got no pain. i am perfectly healthy. how can you say that i got cancer?" said a man to me. trust me, a patient in denial phase is not easy to deal with. this is why soft skill is so damn important! 
there was once where i cry in a clinic in front of a 30 years old woman, who was divorced and currently living with her mother and her child.  she was diagnosed with breast cancer, but refused for operation and chemotherapy. oh my. how does she expect to live with her cancer without treatment? 
i always said to breast cancer survivors " wow, looking at you, no one can ever guess that you are a cancer survivor". i am not lying. many women had survived mastectomy and chemo, and radiotherapy. i've seen them walking proudly. that is why there is nothing that upset me more than patients who went to look for some traditional medication till the cancer spreads and there is nothing can be done anymore. hiks. 

phew. when it comes to doing what's right for the patient, even a simple decision plays a major part. one single mistake can jeopardize not only a single human's life, because when someone died, they may left their spouse and kids behind. when a patient die, we had to deal with the living ones that have lost their loved ones. and let me tell you, breaking the bad news, whether telling someone that they had just been diagnosed with cancer, or their family had passed away, never gets easier even with experience.

there is not a single day that went by without me wishing to be a better doctor. but now i think i need a good night sleep.
*yawning*
zzzzzzzzzzzzzz